Capuchin monkeys are gaining popularity as helpers for the disabled. Jake Smith (right) says the monkey is a great helper, he can make sandwiches, get the paper, the only drawback is when he gets frustrated and throws his own feces at me.

Alright, here's the deal. The famous underwear model Adriana Lima will be in Memphis a lot to watch her gay boyfriend play basketball for the Grizzlies. If you want to keep seeing her in the Victorias Secret magazine you're going to have to help make sure she stays away from the BBQ joints, the chicken wing joints, the catfish places, etc.

If you see her eating ANY fried food just tell her she looks fat in whatever it is she's wearing at the time. Do your part to keep supermodels super.

Yep, the first gay couples are getting married in California and what better way to do it than dressing up as the Marlboro man...cause you know they'll both be puffing one tonight.

I apologize for the lack of recent activity...I was on vacation in Nerdistan.

8 billion cell phone cameras on the planet and these 5 couldn't come up with one? Hell this ESPN camera man was ALL OVER it. What are kids waiting on? I weep for our future.