Former Miss Universe Alicia Machado was forced to close her Twitter account this week over massive critcism she's taking from confusing North Korea and China.

Really? Who in their right mind looks to this woman for international diplomacy advice? Who would be surprised by her getting these countries confused? Who would care?

Straight people know that if a chick like this walks up to you and starts saying stupid things you just nod your head and keep her talking until you get her in bed.

Yep...we all want to do it...but big Bertha has the AUTHORITY to do it. This is the first time in my life I've ever caught myself wishing I was a fat chick.

WTF? I got kicked out of a strip club for doing this one time and this guy gets paid to do it at the airport...for the government.

Returning to our post from below...if January Jones were spying on the russians for us...would it help or hurt morale in the US if they sent her back to the US? See what I mean? Unfortunately it looks like we've got amatuers running our "what to do with hot russian spy's" department.

Remember the hot Russian spy that we kicked out of the country? She just landed on the cover of Maxxim magazine. This is one of the problems with this country...it makes no sense to kick a girl like this out of the country. If she were your typical fat round faced russian broad I could understand it...but this? KEEPING her would have hurt the Russians more than deporting her.