US Military still says it does not have the armor it needs, and adds that it could use a little help in the transportation department as well. 

That lighthouse is there for a reason buddy. 

Proof that women can't resist taking a peek at a good wedgie. 

UN finds Iraqi weapon of mass destruction. U.S. CENTCOM spokesman said "it is a crude device, and obviously would have taken a long time to deliver given the mode of transportation they chose, but the scary part is the donkey would not have shown up on our Radar." 

Recent AP photos show that Moammar Qaddafi is trying out the Isaac Hayes look in a bid to look more "western" and "hip". Sources also reveal that Qaddafi is demanding that the Libyan Army Band play the theme music from "Shaft" whenever he gets off the plane 

Hospital staff in England accidentally release the results of Elton Johns emergency colonostomy.

U.S hosts the 2005 Janitor Olympics in Sheboygan Wisconsin.  

Study proves 9 out of 10 Americans are afraid of bats. 

Vatican unveils new training program for nuns, vows that catholic schools will get even tougher.  

I don't know what's more shocking, that he is doing this in public...or that there is a line forming... 

Officials for the PBA (Paraplegic Basketball Association) admit ticket sales are slow but predict that the game will catch on. Fans remain unconvinced. Season ticket holder Tom Smith says "it's too slow, they just kind of roll around and fight over the ball alot...and they need to lower the net to get some more scoring going on." 

It is common knowledge that the leader in the Tour de France gets to wear the yellow jersey. A lesser known fact is that the last place rider has to wear the pink jersey. 

Dude, don't move...you've got a HUGE bug on your back... 

Former Yankee star pitcher Dwight Gooden was arrested Sunday for throwing a "one hit-her" 

The new Afghani army launches operation "Steel Camel" 

Mickelson complains that the stiff green fees at the San Francisco Open are getting to be a real pain in the ass. 

The Chinese military secretly releases it's Force Modernization Strategy...the Trojan Dragon. The Taiwanese are currently considering wether to let the gift inside their gates.  

WOODS: What kind of bug is that? MICKELSON: I think it's a spider...  

Wait 'til her husband sees this.... 

Like it or not their votes count every bit as much as yours.... 

Relatives say Camilla Parker Bowles is devastated that Prince Charles has left her for a woman he met on his last trip to New Guinnea. Camilla was quoted as saying "she dresses like a tramp!"  

It's official, singer Michael Jackson answers question from reporters on how many children he has slept with at his Neverland Ranch.